HALLOWEEN HORRORFEST 2020: The Thirsty Dead (1974)

Our sponsor today is Will Farry, who gave a generous donation to Black Lives Matter!  Anyone who donates $10 or more during the Horrorfest and gives me a copy of the receipt gets to program a horror movie in this Marathon of The Macabre!

To commemorate Indigenous People Day*, Will has chosen a film about a lost tribe of...vampire cultists? in the Philippines, The Thirsty Dead!

Even though I have been doing this for three years, I think this is truly the first time I have to ask....what the fuck did I just watch?

Laura (Jennifer Billingsly, who is very 70‘s) is one of four women abducted from Manila by red-robed types.  They’re taken to a hidden civilization that lives in a cave system in the Philippine jungle lorded over by the very white Banu (John Considine) and Ranu (Tani Guthrie).  Said civilization worships Ranu’s husband, a head in a box that I think is named Raoul, and is waiting for the arrival of the reincarnation of a...goddess?  Spirit? Sorceress?...that revived said Head In A Box and gave them the secret to immortality.  Luckily for Laura, she resembles that goddess?  Spirit?  Sorceress?  Unluckily for her fellow abductees, that secret involves a potion made from...virgin? blood.  Understandably, Laura is not condusive to their pitch to join them in eternal youth and beauty.

I had to infer quite a bit of what I just summarized because narrative and coherency is not this film’s long suit.  While I assume that these women are supposed to be virgins by the way Bonnie (Chiqui da Rosa, the only Filipino woman among the abductees) is introduced as ‘the virgin queen of Manila, it doesn’t jibe with the inclusion of Claire (Judith McConnell, whose jokes about white slavery, prostitution and rape have not aged well), who is first seen dancing in her underwear and, we are told, has ‘a million’ boyfriends, in their party.  We’re never quite told what the deal is with this civilization, why its ruled over by two white people, or what happened that reduced Raoul to a head in a box.  There is no mention of the fact that this potion doesn't works beyond the general area surrounding the caves until the ‘Ring of Age’ is mentioned with only twenty minutes left to go of this film’s eighty-seven minute running time.  And when the former donors of blood for that potion, aged and decayed way beyond their years, are released, we get the strong implication they are cannibals by the way they tear apart some randos in a scene...but then they are herded back into their cages before anything can happen.

The weird thing is how, as I struggled through this, I kept being reminded of the Rod Hardy directed Ozploitation film Thirst, which is also about a hidden place where people believe drinking blood gives them life and youth.  There’s a sequence that’s eireely similar to one in that film, except Thirst had, well, a plot and characterization and actors who could act...you know, stuff like that.

If it wasn’t for the blood drinking aspect, I would swear this was a high adventure/fantasy film marketed as a horror film.  After all, one of the alternate names for this thing was Blood Cult of Shangri-La.  There are some moments of amusement--dig the disco rompers on Banu!--but to get through those moments you have to sift through long stretches of bad acting, worse dubbing and overall dullness.  I would not recommend this, although you can access a really muddy print of it on Youtube.

Our sponsor for tomorrw is Evan From The Lurking Transmission!  Evan has chosen for me 2002‘s submarine ghost story Below, directed by personal favorite David Twohy and featuring Bruce Greenwood, Olivia Williams (who is luuuuuuurvely) and Zach Galifinakis!

There are Eight Sponsorship Slots Left in the Halloween Horrorfest this year.  Besides donating to Black Lives Matter, you can claim a slot by:

1) Becoming a Domicile of Dread Patreon at any level.  Patreons always get a free slot, as well as advance access to podcasts and other goodies!

2) buying me a coffee at Ko-Fi.  Suggested donation is $3

4) making a donation to the charity chosen by a sponsor on his/her/their day. Like with the third possibility, please forward me proof of donation.

As with last year, if I end up with more sponsors than there are days in October, I will go into Horrorfest Overtime, which means Halloween goes into November for me--and you!

*--Yeah, yeah....Christopher Columbus was an egotistical jerk who mistook where he was and tortured the indigenous people he found.  Fuck that guy.  He doesn’t deserve a day.