You see, I was in retail for over a decade, mainly serving as assistant manager for a sporting goods store on Myrtle Avenue, the main drag of the neighborhood of Ridgewood here in New York City. Myrtle Avenue, being the area’s shopping district, pumped Christmas Music up and down the street. I lived on Myrtle Avenue, which meant I was assailed by the Tunes O’ The Season for almost the entire time I was awake for two months. I heard countless interpretations of the same two dozen or so holiday scenarios, and I came to loathe the genre with a dark, dark passion. Still do--and there are some that launch me into a rant the likes of which you have never seen (‘Baby It’s Cold Outside’ has nothing to do with Christmas, and it’s about date rape; the original recording called the two vocalists ‘the Spider’ and ‘the Fly.’ It is hideous, and I will fight you if you insist otherwise).
...But I don’t hate all Christmas music. There are holiday songs that I have affection for. Not surprisingly, many of them are somewhat dark and kinda grounded in a reality most of the sugar-frosted trifles we think of as Christmas music aren’t. I would like to share those songs I do like with you.
To start with, let’s look at this hyper-obscure single from a one-hit-wonder of the late 90‘s. You may not know where you know Harvey Danger from--Hell, you might not even remember the correct name of their one monster hit*--but you know them. Just say the words ‘Disturbing Behavior’ to a film fan who grew up around 1998, and I’ll be surprised if said fan doesn't start singing ‘Paranoia, Paranoia/Everybody’s coming to get me.’ But this Seattle band had a career after ‘Flagpole Sitta,’ and they put out this bittersweet ode to having to work on the Biggest Holiday of The Year around the time they put out their last album.
I like this so much because it views the holiday from a point of view we don’t think about much. After all, loads of people have to operate the restaurants and movie theaters and grocery stores we go to on that day we’re supposed to be spending with our family and we don't think of how painfully lonely these people must be. Harvey Danger thought about them, and they're going to share their thoughts with you. Enjoy.
*--I am a fan of covers, and I possess one cover of ‘Flagpole Sitta’ by The Punk Shop Boys that is titled ‘I’m Not Sick But I’m Not Well.’
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